It's day 3 of thanksgiving break, I've hugged 13 people I haven't seen since July, gotten 4 OMGURALIVE phonecalls, too many texts to count, drank hot chocolate 5 times, eaten 22 delicious malted milk balls, opened my camera 6 times, sung 4 Christmas songs, told my mom I loved her 7 times, and kissed my dog 27 times. It feels good to be here. :)

(23 malt balls and just realized that on the side of the Whoppers box there's a recipe for a candy malt shoppe pie! I SO have to try it!) I'm excited because while I might be out of classes for a week, the youngsters still have school till Wednesday which means I have a chance to go visit the kids at Pine Grove! I'm super excited to see all of them again. It feels really good to know they've been asking where I've been and saying they missed me, but on the other hand that means there isn't anyone else playing with them like me. I love playing charades and whatever other crazy game I can think of at the moment to do with them. They're such an awesome bunch of kids I really can't wait to see them again.
Going to church this morning with my mom was such a surprise, I got to see both Father Lodi and Father Sandy, and they said if I wanted to read at mass next Sunday before I leave to call them later this week. I might just do it. I really miss reading at church.
I've been stuck on phase 3 of the annoying What Drives Edward Volvo contest until today. I sat down, I didn't try to beat it, instead I just sat and watched the patterns the maze took and did things that way. It's silly but I'm so proud of myself to finally beat that thing! It was really rather frustrating the amount of times I tried a week or so ago and couldn't do it. Phase 4 and 5 weren't nearly as tantalizing.
NaNoWriMo is almost over! A week left and I'm pretty much on target. Since I'll have a little extra time this week (kind of) I'm going to try to bang it out early so I can satisfy my inner editor and work on tweaking it just a little bit. It's been really hard not to poke at things as I write them, it's just how I do things ya know?
I saw New Moon last night! Yay! It was really much better than I expected and maybe that's why it wasn't horrible, I went in with low expectations. The only 2 things that really bugged me were how much the audience was missing; having read the book I could make connections better and pull out important details that weren't pointed out in the movie and the marriage proposal; he's not supposed to propose until the 3rd movie and the scene where he proposes is supposed to be so much more intimate than a confrontation in the woods! I really hope they don't have the wedding in the 3rd movie and I hope to see more of the Cullens. Aside from that I'm a happy camper. Although I still can't believe they already have a release date for Eclipse. July 2010, I am so there!
I have to go dress shopping soon for a party or two I'm attending in December and I'm kind of looking forward to it. It might just be that right now I'm in a girly mood and the thought of putting on my pearls and pulling my hair back into an elegant bun is very appealing right now, or it might just be the fact that sometimes I really enjoy dressing up. Either way I'm pretty excited about looking for a dress. I'm aware of how picky I am, I'm very particular about almost everything, but it's going to be fun regardless. Most of all I'm looking forward to having my mom with me to shop for it. I know she'll tell me the truth about a dress, she'll tell me the truth about anything, she won't sugar coat it.. she never does! :)

I don't celebrate Thanksgiving and it's never bothered me. I used to go back to Spain and it would be a nice little vacation, but since I'm staying in the states I've become a lot more self conscious of not celebrating it. (24 malt balls) For my mom engaging in Turkey day festivities would mean succumbing to the American ways and becoming more a part of this country than she'd like and I can understand that. While I am very proud of my Spanish heritage and I absolutely love all of the customs and traditions that come with that, I don't personally feel like adding a new tradition would make me any less Spanish or any more American. Thanksgiving is a purely American holiday, but the idea of giving thanks for everything in your life and celebrating those ideals and joys with family and people you love is by far not purely American, or purely anything for that matter. And I think that's what I'd like to part take in. Mind you, I don't need to wait for one day to say thank you and I don't, but I like the idea of dedicating an entire day to being appreciative and acknowledging all of life's surprises. So yes, I'm considering trying something Thanksgiving like this year. Maybe sitting down with my mom over a nice dinner and talking about everything we're thankful for and relish in the wonderfulness of being together. Not to mention we've actually got company over this year, so I think I have to actually do the whole Turkey and mashed potatoes deal. What else do people eat on thanksgiving? I'll have to look it up and whip up something appropriate for the occasion. We'll see how it goes yes?

For everyone already home and spending time with your families, have a wonderful week if I don't speak to you soon! :)

Peace, Love & Pancakes
-Lib

(25 malt balls)

Today

Today is Saturday, November 14th, 2009. It's not new year in any country, religion, culture, or happenstance. And yet for me it is a new beginning. Not one I necessarily looked for or wanted yet I'm ready to open my arms to it, because let's be honest .. if I don't I'll have to deal with it anyway right? So as I sit here listening to the stupid Verizon Fios commercial before my FannyLu song I prepare myself for the changes that lie ahead. A new-er mindset, things to get reaccustomed to, and other such things to get reacquainted with. Some of which I'm actually really looking forward to and some that I know with a little time will become second nature again. I know what to expect and how to deal with it so overall I think I'll be just peachy. Good news is I'll have plenty of time to do more of the things I've been complaining I don't quite have enough time to do. Things that are changing now either because of the newness or because I'm choosing to change it because of the newness .. more time with my friends, my cell phone box is staying full for a while, I'm not going to answer my phone as promptly as I usually would and it's getting turned off when I go to sleep, I am sooo gaming again, JustAskLib will be reopen soon with some restrictions like a set number of emails I'll agree to answer monthly and such and hopefully a website where questions and answers will be posted so in case I don't get to your particular email you can hopefully still find some help and maybe just the answer you were looking for, more blogs, more videos, more randomness, less stress, Sunday Night movie night is back(info below), and my vent is open to anyone who wishes to come chat with me(info below)!

Sunday Night Movie Night: Every Sunday night I'll be on skype along with whoever wishes to be there with me and watch a movie! Hopefully we'll have a nice little conference of new and old friends and some good times watching a flick together. Think of it like going over to your friend's house and hanging out. Now with cold weather and such and the fact that most of my friends are so far away this will be perfect to hang out and do something fun. I'll post the movie for Sunday November the 22nd within the next few days! :) See you there?
My skype name: itsjustlib

My vent info:
Hostname: Titanium.typefrag.com
Port: 57324
No Password
Hop on and if I'm there we can chat it up :) BTW my name is [PancakeQueen] Kale

And I suppose a message to anyone who happens to read this. I don't write a blog for you to hold anything against me or to give you things to throw in my face. I don't expect you to understand or agree with everything I say and I don't expect to have to justify anything that I say. I don't write on here so that you'll have something to be angry about and I don't expect you to take anything personally. Most of the time I write because I want to, because I have thoughts or ideas that I need to get out of head and into words that I can see. You can call me self indulgent or too wrapped up with myself and I won't particularly care. You probably don't know me. All you know is what you see, how you analyze and take what you see, what I choose to share in this blog and what you take from reading it. If you happen to enjoy my odd ramblings and usually scrambled thoughts then lovely. If you're someone dear to me and you're just wondering what's going on in my mind or what I happen to be going through then I'll warn you now that I don't always make sense, but I promise I'm not always totally ridiculous. Other than that, I hope you have a fantastic day and that the many twists and turns of life lead you to the exact place you hope to end up in .. and they don't then call me, I've got a shovel and we'll start digging.

Peace, Love & Pancakes
-Lib

Life

I feel so lucky in so many ways. I have so much to be thankful for. I couldn't even begin to describe them all. And yet so often I feel like I don't appreciate it all, like I could be doing more, like I don't take good care of what I have. And it makes me so sad. I was born and I have a beautiful mother who adores me, people in my life who genuinely care about me, a wonderful mind, a bright future ahead of me .. and yet I feel like I waste so much of my time. I don't know exactly what it is I should be doing differently or that I feel I should be doing differently. All I know is that I need change. There is so much beauty in the world every day. I don't understand why so many horrible things have to happen. I don't understand why people as a whole don't stop being jerks to each other. There's so much good that we could be doing and yet we don't. Life can be so complicated and so simple and so bad and so wonderful and so many things that a thesaurus would do it no justice.

I just want to say thank you so much. To everything. For giving me patience and showing me how to be a good person. For forgiving me, for loving me. I won't ever be able to thank everyone enough for the things I have and I've experienced. All I can do is try to pass it on and do better than I am.

And maybe that's all I can do. All I have to say right now.

Spaced

One of my biggest pet peeves about myself (is it weird that I have pet peeves about myself?) is that a lot of times I can't find the word in English that I want to use to name or describe it, sometimes I just forget the word and say 'Whatchamacallit' instead. (OMG So Blogger won't take youtube, facebook, or autosave as real words, but they accept Whatchamacallit!?) This is one of those times where I can't really explain how I feel because I don't really know what to call it, in any language. So, I'm just going to try and describe it so to speak. As usual I don't expect most of the following to make entirely too much sense.

I feel all over the place. I thinks it's a combination of having a lot of things going on right now and my mind. My mind always has a lot of things going on. It never really lets me rest and most of the time it's okay. Heck, most of the time I love it. I love how I can read an article or talk to someone and somehow a few seconds later my mind has wandered off to something completely different that usually makes me laugh because of the randomness and the fact that it does indeed relate in a way only my mind can think up when I'm not really thinking. My mind thinks faster than I do. If I'm consciously thinking of something the process of thinking can go pretty slow, but if I just kind of let my mind go off on it's own tangent it does amazing things. It can be a lot of fun and I enjoy surprising myself, but right now I feel like I wish I could put my mind on standby. It's not even like it's thinking ridiculously awful things or anything of the sort, at least not more so than usual. It's not that I worry too much either .. trust me. I just feel like I have too many ideas. There are too many things my mind wants to do, that I want to do, that I don't have the time or the means to do. And so I feel like half my mind is going to waste and then I get frustrated or annoyed that I can't do everything. Which in itself is annoying because I'm smarter than that. I know that it's silly. I love what I'm doing and I know that some things will come with time and that there's just no physical way to do everything all at once and even if there was I'd probably kill myself trying and in return not have fun doing it anyway. I'd say that I don't have enough time for everything and I'd be right, but that's because everything includes so many things .. let me give you a little glimpse of what everything is.

I have 243 unedited, untouched video clips on my camera.
I have 3 pages of video ideas and notes.
I have 2 pages of Wrock songs I want to write.
I have 16 pages of pieces of non Wrock songs to finish writing.
I have 7 songs I'd like to record.
I have 13 new recipes I want to try.
I'm behind on NaNoWriMo and I fully intend on finishing.
I just painted my room a few months ago and I want to do it again before Thanksgiving.
I have 5 unfinished blogs.
I have 13 new voicemails, I'd probably have more but it's full.
I have at least 8 people that I miss dearly and would love to spend some time with.
I have 2 upcoming appointments I need to move to different dates.
I need to find a day off to get my 3rd molars removed and get braces.
I'm usually done with Christmas shopping by now .. haven't even started.
I need to send out my out of country presents out in 3 weeks.
I have 2 tests to study for.
I have a work type project I'm working on for my friend Bill.
I want to publish my poetry.
I want to be a part of a radio show or podcast.
I need to find a dress for EvilDay2.
I want to finish writing my book about Pancakes.
I want to actually fall asleep when I'm tired.
I want a level 10 dish in Restaurant City.
I want to finish the illustrations for my Children's Book.
I'd like to hand make all my Christmas Cards this year.

Yea ... and that's just the immediate list that I could think of with no sleep. So, am I overly ambitious? I don't think I am. I just have a lot that I want to do. I know it's preposterous to assume that I can do it all, I just don't want to leave anything unfinished. All with time I suppose. I just find it annoying how my mind is always here and there and this and that, I can focus when I need to but when I'm not focused I'm ... a lot of things.

Okay, I'm done for now I suppose. I almost feel like trying to blog everyday. What's wrong me!? Ack! I'm going to finish this up before my mind makes me think I want to do anything crazy.

Peace, Love & Pancakes
-Lib

It's 5:23 ... I can't sleep. I haven't been able to sleep for a while, despite my efforts. Watched the rest of Push (Great movie btw), drank milk, got extra blankets, took blankets away, listened to classical music, played around with those stupidly addictive facebook apps, watched some youtube videos, lied down with no noise at all ... wrote a blog.

So I'm just going to ramble for a bit and not expect anything I say to make sense.

I hate coughing. I hate it even more when my nose is runny and I have to cough. I need a really big breakfast, but I know I'm not going to get it. I'm grumpy because I'm tired. Me Me Me. How many times can I say the word 'I' in this blog? I don't really think I want to know. I'm obsessing over the chartjackers single 'I've got nothing'. It's pretty much amazing. I'm behind on NaNoWriMo .. I want to catch up today during class. Is it bad that I've got my ticket to see Twilight: New Moon already? Who wants to come with me!? Emily's going too in her perspective theater. I love autosave. I think facebook should add autosave. I don't like that facebook and autosave aren't considered real words by the blog, even though the blog itself uses the word autosave. And seriously .. facebook? Catch up with the times. *Mentally snaps fingers* I miss my friend Patrick, he's like my little brother and he's totally made of awesome and I've been an awful friend and haven't kept in touch. In fact I've been doing that a lot .. not keeping in touch. I've gotten so bad. People I need to find/get back in touch with because they're awesome and I miss them: Patrick, Mike T.F, Nick Webster, Jacob, Matt Gerber, Julian, and Aleksey. Lainey, Bo and Alicia don't count because even if it's the occasional skype/facebook comment I do have soooome contact with them, as much as I miss conference calls watching silly videos and being random. I got to talk to Julie, Brian, and Emily today and that made me eternally happy. I've missed them so much. "OMG HAI GUISE! WHO WANTS A BODAY MASSAGE!?" -Emily as EdwardCullen. Yes my friends are that awesome. I painted my nails this pretty clearish, sparkly, pink and I really like it. The wall is really cold. My head hurts. My spongebob squarepants silly straw sippy cup is dead. It makes me sad. My hair's a mess. I need a shower. I'm gunna go do that.

Buh Bye

37 'I's in this blog. .. Well I guess that one makes it 38.

Peace, Love & Pancakes
(I hate how grammatically speaking there should be a comma after Love ,.. as in 'Peace, Love, & Pancakes. So, I always leave it out because I don't like it. I'm sorry comma .. please don't hate me)

42... okay I'm done. 43.