Spaced

One of my biggest pet peeves about myself (is it weird that I have pet peeves about myself?) is that a lot of times I can't find the word in English that I want to use to name or describe it, sometimes I just forget the word and say 'Whatchamacallit' instead. (OMG So Blogger won't take youtube, facebook, or autosave as real words, but they accept Whatchamacallit!?) This is one of those times where I can't really explain how I feel because I don't really know what to call it, in any language. So, I'm just going to try and describe it so to speak. As usual I don't expect most of the following to make entirely too much sense.

I feel all over the place. I thinks it's a combination of having a lot of things going on right now and my mind. My mind always has a lot of things going on. It never really lets me rest and most of the time it's okay. Heck, most of the time I love it. I love how I can read an article or talk to someone and somehow a few seconds later my mind has wandered off to something completely different that usually makes me laugh because of the randomness and the fact that it does indeed relate in a way only my mind can think up when I'm not really thinking. My mind thinks faster than I do. If I'm consciously thinking of something the process of thinking can go pretty slow, but if I just kind of let my mind go off on it's own tangent it does amazing things. It can be a lot of fun and I enjoy surprising myself, but right now I feel like I wish I could put my mind on standby. It's not even like it's thinking ridiculously awful things or anything of the sort, at least not more so than usual. It's not that I worry too much either .. trust me. I just feel like I have too many ideas. There are too many things my mind wants to do, that I want to do, that I don't have the time or the means to do. And so I feel like half my mind is going to waste and then I get frustrated or annoyed that I can't do everything. Which in itself is annoying because I'm smarter than that. I know that it's silly. I love what I'm doing and I know that some things will come with time and that there's just no physical way to do everything all at once and even if there was I'd probably kill myself trying and in return not have fun doing it anyway. I'd say that I don't have enough time for everything and I'd be right, but that's because everything includes so many things .. let me give you a little glimpse of what everything is.

I have 243 unedited, untouched video clips on my camera.
I have 3 pages of video ideas and notes.
I have 2 pages of Wrock songs I want to write.
I have 16 pages of pieces of non Wrock songs to finish writing.
I have 7 songs I'd like to record.
I have 13 new recipes I want to try.
I'm behind on NaNoWriMo and I fully intend on finishing.
I just painted my room a few months ago and I want to do it again before Thanksgiving.
I have 5 unfinished blogs.
I have 13 new voicemails, I'd probably have more but it's full.
I have at least 8 people that I miss dearly and would love to spend some time with.
I have 2 upcoming appointments I need to move to different dates.
I need to find a day off to get my 3rd molars removed and get braces.
I'm usually done with Christmas shopping by now .. haven't even started.
I need to send out my out of country presents out in 3 weeks.
I have 2 tests to study for.
I have a work type project I'm working on for my friend Bill.
I want to publish my poetry.
I want to be a part of a radio show or podcast.
I need to find a dress for EvilDay2.
I want to finish writing my book about Pancakes.
I want to actually fall asleep when I'm tired.
I want a level 10 dish in Restaurant City.
I want to finish the illustrations for my Children's Book.
I'd like to hand make all my Christmas Cards this year.

Yea ... and that's just the immediate list that I could think of with no sleep. So, am I overly ambitious? I don't think I am. I just have a lot that I want to do. I know it's preposterous to assume that I can do it all, I just don't want to leave anything unfinished. All with time I suppose. I just find it annoying how my mind is always here and there and this and that, I can focus when I need to but when I'm not focused I'm ... a lot of things.

Okay, I'm done for now I suppose. I almost feel like trying to blog everyday. What's wrong me!? Ack! I'm going to finish this up before my mind makes me think I want to do anything crazy.

Peace, Love & Pancakes
-Lib